[D13, EE] Friendship is a Two-Way Street (open)

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

That got an enthusiastic nod.

"Hai hai, I do know. And you mustn't feel too bad about liking that sort of thing; Pillow books are like geisha houses I think; A proper outlet for things, even when they're not proper. They wouldn't be so popular otherwise I think, and we'd all be rereading the Tao for the four-hundredth time in a year. Not that there would be anything wrong with that of course, but samurai are human too."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

"Yes, they are the... proper outlet." Considering that Degarashi had barely read any of the books himself, his understanding of how to behave properly would be in question without them as a shield. "I don't know, Yukarin-sama. Having a taste of that manner of improvement impropriety might make one wonder if the truth is as delectable as the fiction. It might be more a case that they are but the lesser of two evils, allowing samurai to assuage the need to seek out and indulge in the sins of desire laid out upon the pages."

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

"Surely Bayushi-sama is not so weak as to lack that control, neh? You just need to remember your duty to your lord and such and such. At least if you're a Crab. The Lion might replace that word with honor. I suppose I could not speak for the way the Scorpion are taught such things."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

Degarashi eyed Yukarin for a moment, but it seemed her words were earnest, and without ulterior motives. "No, I am not quite so weak, but as the underhand I often must consider these things, for if I can conceive of them as motivations, so can others. And I most certainly haven't failed to properly serve my lord to the utmost of my capabilities. In fact, I've even learned some new ways to serve that shall be quite handy in my future, I assume."

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

She thought about it for a moment before nodding, "I see what you mean. And I know I can understand having found new ways of serving during such troubled tests as well. Perhaps the Unicorn do tend to oversimplify things~"

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

He tried not to smirk too much. "Perhaps, but there is no harm in living simply." He shrugged. "I'll look forward to relaxing among the dragon with my art, but some part of me will miss the trials I faced here, and rising to meet them. I daresay I've been tested half a dozen times in half as many days, it's a wonder how I've any stamina left."

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

"DO you feel like you've met the trials you've faced here? Because that's one area I certainly feel I've failed at."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

Degarashi turned to Yukarin, making a point to catch her eyes. "Tell me, Yukarin-sama, what have you learned since coming here?"

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

"Do you mean Nikesake itself? Or this entire winter up here in Lion lands?"

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

"Mostly those parts where you think you have failed. What have you learned in the process?"

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

That got a frown.

"I am unsure. I learned a little about the Clans and warfare and history and such, but I'm sure that's not what you really mean. As far as lessons go, things that I can take forward with me... that is what I am unsure about."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

"You learned that you are not infallible. You learned that the world is dangerous, that there are times when you will lose those you care about. And you leaned that, after all that," he gestured around them, "that everything is still here, in part because of that loss, that sacrifice made by others who are no longer here." Degarashi had been moving closer to Yukarin, and now stood maybe a little closer than was proper, his words sharp and clear. "I see that you have lost someone, now I ask; what would they say if they were here before you now, knowing you were alive in this place they left behind? What would they have you do, with the empire needing its samurai now more than ever?"

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

"This is not the first time I have lost someone. It is just... the first time I have lost someone where I felt like I could have done something to prevent them from being lost. That is what I am afraid of; That if they were here before me THAT is what they would say. They would ask me why I did not act, why I did not put myself at risk for someone dear's sake when they were willing to do so for the Empire at large."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

Looking around to make sure nobody was watching, Degarashi reached out and lightly gripped Yukarin's shoulder, an act of reassurance he'd found quite helpful of late.

"I don't believe that they would. I think they'd prefer that you carry on doing what you can. When...before Yukinaga died, he wrote a letter to me, telling me he may not come back from the mission that claimed his life. The last time we spoke it ended poorly, and he wanted to try to resolve things with me when he returned. We never got that chance. But in that same letter he professed his faith in me, saw my doubts and fears, and rather than focus on them, he talked about my honor and reliability. He cared for me, Yukarin-sama. Nobody who truly cared for you would question your decisions. Try to look at yourself the way they did... That's what I do now, try to see myself how my brother did. If you can't find yourself, allow someone else to do it for you."

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

If she was alarmed by her shoulder being touched, it didn't show, "The way they saw me... I see what you mean. I will think on it, and try."

It was tough, because one did not always know what others really thought of them. But that message of faith in them... All she could do is go based on Mogami's actions, which spoke of someone who looked up to her almost like she had her older sister. And while she didn't feel she deserved that kind of trust and deference, she also knew it was likely her own sister hadn't been as perfect as she had thought her either. That did not make either relationship any less valid, or real, or special.

"I suppose it is hard, when you cannot ask anymore. But going based on our own fears rather than their words and actions towards us is just... silly."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

"It is silly, Yukarin-sama, very silly indeed." Releasing her shoulder, Degarashi leaned in until he was in safe whisper distance. "And you should really save being silly to the professionals." Then he winked and stood back up, as if nothing had happened.

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

She only responded with a curt nod, keeping herself from smiling by putting on a faux super serious expression.

"I will keep that all in mind then."

Yukarin looked around, down the street and down the other way, "It seems the sun is going to set soon. I should get going to where I'd intended to in the first place. I take it you were on your way somewhere as well."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

The scroll from earlier was whipped out of its pouch in an instant. "Paperwork! Traveling outside my clan's territory takes a lot of paperwork, I'm expediting the process." He smiled and bowed deeply. "I hope this humble fool has helped to make things just a little brighter for you, Yukarin-sama."

Yasuki Yukarin · **Joined:** Wed Apr 01, 2020 9:22 pm **Posts:** 802

"If you can't tell already, then perhaps I am more full of secrets than I imagined," she answered, smiling brightly.

"Anyways, I'm off to catch the sunset from the temple. If I do not see you again before I leave the city, may the Fortunes bless your trip to Dragon lands."

Bayushi Degarashi · **Joined:** Fri Apr 03, 2020 7:02 pm **Posts:** 1027

"And may they ever guide your path as well, Yukarin-sama. Until we meet again!"

He bowed once more, then continued on his leg work been the embassies.

/Exit

[D13, EE] Friendship is a Two-Way Street (open)

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